Not feeling too well today because
- My counseling exam was brutal. Expecting a C or lower. Idk.
- Got stood up by someone I needed more information from for class. This is the second time. Pet peeve, careless people with no manners.
- Need to transcribe an interview tonight (that’s like a 3hr commitment right there lol)
- My landlord is not responding to my email that’s kind of urgent
Not the best day, but I think it’ll be somewhat better after my third exam on Monday. Sigh. I take back what I said about being a student forever hahaha.
Dropping by for a few minutes to just say, OMG there’s so much to do!!!
My mellow days are finally over. Now, I’m fighting everyday to get things done and also not die from starvation/sleep deprivation/other. I have two midterms on Tuesday, and then an interview, an assessment, and a quiz due on the following days. THEN this weekend, I have another assessment I have to do, and then it’s November, and I just have a whole bunch of things due that I haven’t even had a chance to look at lol!
Last year, I broke down and cried in my room a couple times from feeling overwhelmed. For some reason, that hasn’t happened to me this year – and I DOUBT it’ll happen to me, because I’m feeling like a robot where it’s like, okay do work – submit – repeat! It’s an odd way of putting it, but there’s not much attachment between myself and each individual assignment that I turn in. Whereas before, I needed everything to be perfect and that was what was stressing me out. Now, I don’t have time to be perfect. Now, I just need to GO GO GO.
I’m not careless though. My grades are good (so far.) Grad school’s really tough but I’m trudging through!
I didn’t know who she was until I saw the trailer for AHS with her song Carousel.
This one is really nice, too. Dollhouse by Melanie Martinez.
So today I drove out of town to administer my first academic assessment. I can’t talk much about it due to confidentiality, but I must say that it was a lot harder to conduct than I imagined it to be. At the end of it, I had a lot of questions buzzing in my head to ask for next class.
On a different note, the people in this state are so nice. I thought it was just Ellensburg, but the people from the location that I visited today had the same level of hospitality and kindness. Before I moved here, my mom told me as a joke that this place will “cure my poisoned mind.” She was right though, because I do feel like a different person now that I’ve been exposed to so many good people. It’s hard to list specifics of how I’ve changed, but I’ve been smiling more, inquiring about others in conversations instead of me talking the entire time, offering help when necessary, etc.
I’m sorry that lately, my posts have been kind of – dreamy. Everything about this state is making me mellow and really chill. Maybe it’s the weather. The people. My classes. I don’t really know, but I’m at this stage in life where I wish I can stay 23 forever and just…be here. Here meaning, this phase of starting grad school, hanging out with friends, living on my own. Even though I’m dying on some days from excess reading/studying…at the end of it all, I love being a student and the life that status entails.
Kind of tight on time, so I’m going to use bullet points today.
I’m happy because
- My friend took me to a pumpkin patch yesterday and I got to select my first pumpkin! I also got to go through a corn maze (also my first time.)
- My parents sent me a care package with lots of neat things. I got a cute blue USB cord (yes, I said cute. Forgive me, I’m Asian), some towels, vitamins, and a coffee mug, among other things. I feel loved.
- Got my first test kit today after school. Tomorrow, we get to practice our Woodcock Johnson achievement test. So stoked.
I’m also adding it on here that I have been inspired to take my adventures elsewhere. I don’t mean now, when I have school, but over the summer when my classes are all going to be online…I’m thinking of teaching English in Japan. A lot of my high-achiever friends are teaching English in China and Korea. Since I want to work with Japanese children and families in Seattle, what better way to polish my language skills than to visit the country itself! Moving to Ellensburg and being on my own has kind of taught me that life’s too short to be stuck in one state/one country your whole life. A crazy voice in my head is saying…hey, if you have the resources, go experience different things!
I know this doesn’t mean much, since it’s only the second week of school. But I just wanted to throw it out there that the workload is 10x that of undergrad, and yeah, I’m still livin’ and breathin’. So *pat on the back.*
Anyways, classes are going surprisingly well for the most part. Readings are long, but relevant to the field so I’m having an easier time motivating myself to keep going. As for assessments and interviews that I will be conducting soon…I found two children who will be participating in both of my studies with the help of a friend from my cohort and my mom’s friend. The Ellensburg community amazes me in that everyone here is generally helpful. If you ask, chances are, you will be given a hand and I’m so so thankful for that.
One thing that is troubling me at the moment, and mind you, this has NOTHING to do with classes – is not having a dining room table. I know this hits first-world-problem pretty hard, but not having a surface to eat separate from my desk is distressing. Recently, my desk has been a complete HAVOC with papers and books everywhere. To make matters worse, these papers and books have their place in specific places on my desk, so taking them off my desk and carefully setting them down on the floor takes about 15 minutes of my time.
Wow, reread what I just wrote. I sound like a whiny baby, but yeah that’s the worst of my problems at the moment WHICH I’M COMPLETELY GRATEFUL FOR. It’s very easy to burn out in grad school, but I’ve made really nice friends here (I went running with one of them today!), and classes are tough, but helpful and interesting. Hopefully this euphoric stage lasts for a while because honestly, I couldn’t be more content with my life right now.
I’m done with classes for this week…but man, I can’t get over how much work I have to do! Long chapters to read and reflection papers to write…and then of course, planning ahead for interviews and assessments!
I don’t feel overwhelmed just yet, but I do feel SLIGHTLY uneasy with due dates looming just around the corner. I hate this feeling, so I made a to-do list with tasks to complete this weekend. My goal is to stay a week ahead of schedule, so if I slip up anywhere, I have that extra time to catch up on an assignment.
Today, I have three chapters to read and a reflection paper to write. This is my third 30 minute break.
One of my professors mentioned in class today that you shouldn’t feel guilty about taking mini breaks in graduate school. Convince yourself that the break will make you even more productive afterwards, she said. That’s one way to prevent a burn-out.
oh. speaking of, my break is over. Back to work!